Do You Hear That?

A 16 year old girl that we know nearly died yesterday in a terrible car accident. She was driving on the Interstate, in the rain, when an 18-wheeler came over on her. She, being an inexperienced driver, swerved out of his way, which caused her Ford Freestyle (basically a cross-over) to spin. The vehicle spun into the wooded median where it hit "something hard" and proceeded to flip, end over end. The girl and her friend were able to crawl out of the upside down car and walk away with minor bruises and scratches.

Her mother called RedDaddy last night with the details, tearfully exclaiming that there were 100 ways her baby could have died and praising God's mercy for her safety. She ended the conversation by telling him to "go hug each one of your girls and tell them they are never getting a driver's license".

Um. No.

Before I go any further, I want to be clear that this is NOT a gossipy, holier-than-thou post. This is me sounding the alarm!

I was on the cell phone with RedDaddy when the call came in that "Ashley" had been in an accident. He asked me to pray for her and then told me about her planned trip. Ashley is 16, and has had her license for about 6 months. She and a friend were headed 3 1/2 hours away, on the Interstate, in the rain, to pick up two other friends and make the return trip...3 1/2 hours, Interstate, more rain...in the same day. Anyone else see a flaw in this slaw?

A little bit more back story on "Ashley" and another disclaimer: I do NOT think she is a bad kid! I don't think she is very different from most 16 year olds. I have NO specific problem with Ashley personally. However, there are some observations that are important to my point. First of all, RedDaddy has seen her driving...cigarette in one hand, cell phone in the other; taking corners far too fast; and doing the typical teenage radio fiddling, head bopping, friend laughing thing. Secondly, the first time I was in her home, I walked past her bedroom to the restroom. When I came out I whispered to RedDaddy, "Who smokes?" He said, "No one." I raised an eyebrow. He replied, "Well, Ashley burns incense in her room." I actually laughed out loud and said, "Oh, so that's what they're calling it now!" Not two weeks later he came home and said, "Well, you pegged it. Ashley's mom caught her smoking...and not Marlboro's either."

Now, my problem is not that she is a typical teenage driver, or that she smokes (although the pot is problematic, being illegal and all). My problem is with the parental response. The course of action on the smoking front was to give her permission to smoke cigarettes...and ONLY cigarettes...because, "Hey, they're gonna do what they want anyway!"

Really, Mom? Really? And yet, now that SHE almost got killed on the Interstate you want ME to deny my kids a driver's license. Like I said: Um. No!

I have some ideas: How 'bout we teach our kids to be responsible BEFORE we give them liberties that may get them killed!? How 'bout we teach our kids that smoking or drinking is not good for you, and that it is illegal before the age of 18 or 21? How about we teach them to respect the authority God has placed them under (IE: parent and government) by obeying rules and regulations? Why don't we monitor them as they are given new privileges/responsibilities and help them to handle new found freedoms?

I liken it to the idea of teaching kids to swim. How did you do that? Did you throw yours in the deep end of the pool and say, "Well, there you go. You have to learn sometime! I can't shelter you forever." NO! You got in the water WITH them. You held the close until they became comfortable. Then you gave them some instructions and had them try floating while you HELD them. Little by little you gave them more and more "freedom", all the while sticking close by in case they got into trouble. Eventually, they could swim on their own. Of course, you still sat near by and watched...just in case.

You know what? I'm tired. I'm tired of reading articles about kids dying in preventable car accidents. I'm tired of hearing about 10 year old alcoholics, or 12 year old drug addicts. I'm tired of watching babies have babies. And I'm tired of seeing the helpless looks on parents' faces!

Anybody ever heard a tornado siren? Well, listen up! I'm sounding the alarm. There is a storm approaching...NOW! Get your kids to shelter. RUN! Don't hesitate! It will snatch them up and throw them around like rag dolls. IT WILL KILL THEM! Get them to safety...NOW! Don't buy the lie that sheltering your kids is wrong!!


It's YOUR job, not the school's, not the government's, not even the church's. It's all you. YOU are anointed by God to raise them and are graced beyond what any other person on this planet is for YOUR child. YOU are the defense God has designed for their precious hearts, minds, and bodies.

Take a stand. Man up! Make the hard decisions. Say, NO! for goodness sake. Ashley and her mom thought it would be fun for her and her friends to make that trip yesterday. So, Ashley AND her mom should have gone! Today they are rethinking the value of "fun" vs. "wise". I hope you are too.

I've written this through tears. I pray that every parent who reads it will take a few moments to examine their relationship with their kids. Shore up any weak spots now, before the winds begin to blow (no matter what ages your kids are). And if you're not sure how to do that, I truly want to help!